Today at Momscape.com: Are you an Earth Mother or a Creative Rainbow Mother? Find out.
Coupons | Product Reviews | Contests | Articles | Forums | Search | Subscribe
Family Fun | Parenting Tips | Romance | Health & Fitness | Organic Living | Weight Loss | WAHMs
Welcome Momscapers!
Momscape.com is an award winning online magazine delivering
uplifting personal essays
from real parents - plus
practical guidance on parenting,
family fun,
romance,
travel,
health & fitness,
weight loss,
and more.
We invite you to share your
MamaWisdom and to help us
spotlight
products that make your life as a mom easier or better while you
enjoy our money-saving
online coupons and
family travel
discounts.
We want to help you enjoy the
simple (and fine) things life has to offer.
Subscribe to Momscape >
or
Get Our Daily Coupon Updates by Email
Bookmark and share Momscape with your friends:
Today:
Old Navy Maternity
Online Exclusives
Online Coupons
Today's
Favorite Coupons
All Online
Coupons by Store
All Online Coupons by
Category
Printable
Grocery Coupons
Product Reviews
Momscape's
Favorite Things (Blog)
Top-Rated
Mom Product Reviews
Family Fun
Activities & Crafts
Family Travel
Deals
Free Scrapbooking Ideas
Parenting Articles
Baby Tips
Toddler Tips
All Parenting Articles
Inspiration/Essays
Relationships
Marriage
Romance
Friendships
Health
and Fitness
Fitness Tips
Natural Living
Nurturing Your Spirit
Weight Loss
Professional
Family Manager Tips
Home-Based Business
Community
MamaWisdom Forums
About Momscape
Subscribe
Site Map
Links
Link to Us
Privacy Policy
Terms of Service
About us
Contact Us
Mother Matters: Affirming a Mother's Role
Ninety percent of men and 92 percent of women identify family as the
most important institution in society. That’s according to Dr. Ruth
Westheimer and Ben Yagoda’s book, The Value of Family: A Blueprint
for the 21st Century.
The authors go on to point out a few incongruities. For instance, we
point fingers at the family for a host of social ills, from street crime
to school shootings. At the same time, we laud workaholics, we envy
wealth, and we long for the freedom—and the cash—to go anywhere and buy
anything at a moment’s notice.
We conduct studies to prove that mothers don’t matter. Some researchers,
it seems, are bent on reminding us that this role could just as well be
filled by the average babysitter, which the U.S. Department of Labor
feels necessitates less training than a shoe salesperson (source:
Department of Labor’s Dictionary of Occupational Titles).
The Children’s Defense Fund has their own statistic: Most states require
500 hours of training to be a hairdresser, but 32 states don’t require a
single hour of training for childcare center employees. Some studies
show that even moms who sacrifice their careers to stay home aren’t
making a difference in their children’s lives anyway.
Consider these recent studies:
On average, Dads spend 8 minutes, working mothers spend 11 minutes, and
stay-at-home moms spend less than 30 minutes talking to their children
each day. (University of Missouri Extension Service study on balancing
work and family.)
Nearly 20 percent of students in grades 6 through 12 report that they
have not had a 10-minute conversation with at least one of their parents
in more than a month. (Children’s Defense Fund poll.)
Children enrolled in early childhood programs and day care centers
actually have an edge in school over those who stay at home with a
parent. (The Canadian National Longitudinal Survey of Children and
Youth—October 14, 1999).
Just last week, I saw a news broadcast detailing a North Carolina study
that tracked a group of students in a special day care program over a
period of several years. These students, the study found, were
better suited for academic achievement. But the news program failed to
answer the question: Better suited than whom? The program under study
attributed its success to two factors: a low teacher-turnover rate and
low teacher-to-student ratios.
I can’t think of a lower teacher turnover rate or lower
teacher-to-student ratio than that of a mother or father to a child,
whether that care takes place after school, before school, or all day
long.
Perhaps we could best use these study statistics and information not as
a way to champion childcare--at the expense of other options--but as a
way to strategize toward the optimum mom. Socialization is important to
a child’s academic and social development, so that should be part of a
mother’s daily activity.
Playgroups and field trips with neighborhood friends could fit this
bill nicely.
All parents want to help their kids develop--to provide a firm
foundation for a child’s emotional, social, and academic development.
According to a parent poll on the
Zero to Three website, five million infants and toddlers in the
United States have parents who feel they don’t spend enough time with
them.
This Parent Poll on Early Childhood Development, conducted by Peter D.
Hart Research Associates concludes, “[Parents] do not fully understand
the connection between their own parenting practices and the social,
emotional, and intellectual aspects of child development.”
The poll found that 60 percent of children ages 0 to 3 are cared for on
a regular basis by someone other than the parent. Twenty percent have
been cared for by a parent exclusively since birth. At the same time, 39
percent of these parents say they have the greatest influence on their
child’s emotional development.
In short, the study revealed that there are two child development
concepts that many parents fail to grasp: the fact that the continuity
of a caregiver is important, and that the quality of stimulation
provided to a child is more important than the quantity. All stimulation
is not healthy, age-appropriate stimulation.
While we gather information about the best environment for our children,
let’s give moms some credit, too. Moms need to feel important in this
society. It is both arrogant and dangerous to tell mothers that the
average daycare worker is more capable of raising her children than she
is and that she is somehow damaging them if she sacrifices or postpones
her career to be with them.
The profile of a mother no longer fits a common mold. Of all families
with children, just 16 percent (a little over 5 million) fit the
traditional model, in which the father brings home the bacon and the
mother fries it up in the pan. That is, dad is the wage-earner and the
mother stays at home.
The Labor Department reports that the fastest growing segment of the
labor force is mothers of children under the age of 6. Thirty-seven
percent of married mothers work full time, and another 36 percent work
part time. Fifty three percent of mothers with children under the age of
one are working mothers.
But all moms--whether you stay-at-home, or work at home or in an
office--should object to having the all-important role of mother
relegated to little more than a child care worker.
We know what kind of a role we occupy in a child’s mind. We don’t get it
from a study. We get it from the look on her face when she tells you
about her day at school. From the cries in the night when he needs his
mother’s milk, and from the dreams we have of them all taking on the
world with the same vision and idealism that we once had.
Our role is determined not by the latest study or political climate, but
by our nature and instincts as mothers. We know it is the most important
thing we will ever do. So we do it, and we do it well.
Even if recent surveys have undermined the role of the mother,
scientific evidence affirms it.
In our rush to approve everything from attachment parenting to boarding
schools, we can’t forget the basics. Caring, close families and
nurturing mothers really do matter. Parents occupy a huge role in
helping their children develop and thrive intellectually, physically,
and socially throughout their lives.
Young children are so impressionable. Research shows that, unlike other
organs, our brain changes throughout life (unlike other organs). In
fact, the brain is not fully
developed until after puberty.
New brain research proves that the kind of care you provide in the early
years has a significant impact on the actual development of your
child’s brain.
How it works
According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, a baby's brain bubbles
with twice the activity of that of an adult. And the first three years
holds a child's highest potential for learning...by age 3, your child's
brain is already 80 percent of its adult size.
A newborn’s brain has 100 billion neurons, which grow and connect with
other neurons in systems that will allow us to see, move, hear, and
feel. Networks of brain cells allow us to think and learn. Each brain
cell sends and receives signals to other brain cells. Repeated
connections among cells create and strengthen a network of neurons.
So, repeated experiences result in repeated connections and, thus,
stronger connections. This repeated activation leads to brain
development: scientific proof that your child’s early experiences
actually shape the organization of his brain.
Researchers have also identified a direct link between a child’s
relationships in the first part of his life and development in the
social and emotional parts of the brain.
Since repeated experiences activate nerve systems in the brain,
experience in the real world allows your child’s brain to mature.
Healthy relationships, complete with love, attention, and snuggling,
teach your child empathy, confidence, and resilience, as well as
communication skills.
A predictable, safe environment helps children develop a sense of trust
and self-reliance, confidence, curiosity, enthusiasm, and motivation to
learn.
These children might also have a better handle on stress. Studies show
that these children’s bodies actually produce less of a stress hormone
called cortisol.
One theory is that a predictable environment allows children to focus on
learning without the distractions of continual changes. And a study
conducted by Alan Sroufe and Byron Egeland at the University of
Minnesota found that children who had predictable, reliable
relationships developed fewer behavior problems at school. These
children also showed higher confidence levels and better social
relationships.
An environment that centers around the child, that allows the
exploration of all the senses through books, toys, and music, can
further a child’s cognitive development.
Subscribe to Momscape >
or
Get Our Daily Coupon Updates by Email
More Zappos Coupons
Best Buy Coupons
Moms are Raving About
> Netflix Review
> Journal Buddies: A Girl's Journal for Sharing and Celebrating Magnificence
> Jeep Overland Jogging Stroller
> Fisher-Price Baby Papasan Cradle Swing
> Jeep Wrangler All-Weather Umbrella Stroller
> Bugaboo Chameleon Stroller
> Sounds of Baby CD
> Stacking Toy Review: Rock A Stack by Fisher Price
> Burt's Bees Baby Bee Dusting Powder
> Burt's Bees Baby Bee Skin Creme
> Burt's Bees Baby Bee Apricot Oil
> Book Review: Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, by Ina May Gaskins
> Perego Primo Viaggio Infant Car Seat
> Baby Trend Latch Loc > Infant Car Seat
> Baby Cubes Baby Food
> Fuzzi Bunz
Tushies Diapers
> Monkey Bums Baby Sling
> Moby Wrap Baby Carrier
Maya Wrap
> Britax Convertible Car Seat
> Sassy Me in the Mirror Toy
> Isis Breast Pump
Modest Mums Nursing Covers
> Especially for Baby Bottle Warmer
> Shop-and-Play Mat and Activity Center
Coupon Codes: Babies R Us
Coupon Codes: Baby Universe
Coupon Codes: Baby Center
Coupon Codes: Koo Koo Bear Kids
Coupon Codes: Leaps and Bounds
Coupon Codes: One Step Ahead
Coupon Codes: Warm Biscuit Bedding
Discounts: Baby Gear
Discounts: Toddler Gear
Unique Baby Gift Ideas
Free Baby Stuff