Moms these days expect not only to bring home the bacon and fry it up
in a pan, but also to simultaneously help the kids with their homework
while folding laundry and watching the 6 o’clock news.
We moms are experts in multi-tasking.
One such mom recently visited my family. She is a trained facilitator
who makes monthly visits into local homes to help families understand
the needs of children at particular developmental stages.
When the facilitator inquired about my occupation, I shared with her the
idea behind Momscape: We are more effective as moms, wives, lovers,
friends, and professionals when we take time out to nurture our own
spirits. Soul snacks, I explained, remind moms to take 15 minutes each
day to nurture themselves.
“Fifteen minutes!” she exclaimed, in mock horror. “Cut it down to two or
three minutes and we’ll talk.”
Whenever I hear this reaction--and it happens quite a lot--I’m
immediately surprised and saddened. This week, I shared the story with a
friend who pointed out that, for many of us, it’s not an issue of time.
It’s an issue of guilt.
She’s right. The average American spends four hours per day watching TV,
yet the average mom initially balks at the idea of spending 15 minutes
on herself.
The more time we spend on the minutiae of life, the less time we have to
spend with our children. And no matter which side is currently winning
the quality time versus quantity debate, we moms know in our hearts that
all kids need a great deal of both.
But time is in short supply, so instead of delegating tasks to others,
or just saying no in the first place, we take it all on.
We multi-task. We clean the fridge while talking on the phone while
baking cookies while toting a toddler. We check e-mail while nursing the
baby while eating a sandwich.
We open the mail while sautéing mushrooms while listening to our
husbands. We insist that we did, indeed, hear what he said when he
questions it, and we spout off his last four words to prove it.
Through it all, we diaper. We cook. We clean.
Days and weeks like these slip by without us noticing.
How much better it would be to slow down, to get lost in the moment, to
appreciate every one of our God-given, miraculous moments by creating an
environment of serenity, peace, and pure productivity. A place where
there is no frantic, frenzied rushing. No washing our pantyhose in the
shower while we brush our teeth and shampoo our hair. But only a
singular focus that guides us to the next task and the next, throughout
the day.
It just might be that when we try to do too much, we accomplish less.
And I’m fairly certain we don’t enjoy ourselves the way we might.
This week, I challenge you to see if this is true. You might not be able
to accomplish the same number of tasks, but you might be more productive
and effective at the things you choose to do.
We all can manage our time. The trick is to enjoy our time.