Today at Momscape.com: Are you an Earth Mother or a Creative Rainbow Mother? Find out.
Coupons | Product Reviews | Contests | Articles | Forums | Search | Subscribe
Family Fun | Parenting Tips | Romance | Health & Fitness | Organic Living | Weight Loss | WAHMs
Welcome Momscapers!
Momscape.com is an award winning online magazine delivering
uplifting personal essays
from real parents - plus
practical guidance on parenting,
family fun,
romance,
travel,
health & fitness,
weight loss,
and more.
We invite you to share your
MamaWisdom and to help us
spotlight
products that make your life as a mom easier or better while you
enjoy our money-saving
online coupons and
family travel
discounts.
We want to help you enjoy the
simple (and fine) things life has to offer.
Subscribe to Momscape >
or
Get Our Daily Coupon Updates by Email
Bookmark and share Momscape with your friends:
Today:
Online Coupons
Today's
Favorite Coupons
All Online
Coupons by Store
All Online Coupons by
Category
Printable
Grocery Coupons
Product Reviews
Momscape's
Favorite Things (Blog)
Top-Rated
Mom Product Reviews
Family Fun
Activities & Crafts
Family Travel
Deals
Free Scrapbooking Ideas
Parenting Articles
Baby Tips
Toddler Tips
All Parenting Articles
Inspiration/Essays
Relationships
Marriage
Romance
Friendships
Health
and Fitness
Fitness Tips
Natural Living
Nurturing Your Spirit
Weight Loss
Professional
Family Manager Tips
Home-Based Business
Community
MamaWisdom Forums
About Momscape
Subscribe
Site Map
Links
Link to Us
Privacy Policy
Terms of Service
About us
Contact Us
10 Tips for Helping Your Child Adjust to School
by
Dr. Laura Markham
www.yourparentingsolutions.com
So she’s off to school every morning now, like a big kid. But
instead of the exuberance you expected, you find many days – especially
Monday -- starting with tears, or maybe a tummy-ache. Don’t worry,
it’s not unusual for kids to need a little extra help adjusting to the
start of school. What can you do?
1. Facilitate your child’s bonding with the teacher.
Kids need to transfer their attachment focus to their
teacher to be ready to learn. If you notice that your child doesn’t feel
good about his teacher, contact her immediately. Just explain that
he doesn’t seem to have settled in yet, and you hope she can make a
special effort to reach out to him so he feels at home. Any
experienced teacher will understand and pay extra attention to him for a
bit.
2. Facilitate bonding with the other kids. Kids need to
feel bonded with at least one other child. Ask the teacher if she’s
noticed who your child is hanging with. Ask him which kids he’d
like to invite over to play. If he isn’t comfortable with how the
other child would respond to a playdate invitation, you can always
invite the mom with her kid for ice cream after school, or the entire
family for Friday night dinner. You don’t need anything fancier
than pasta, and by the end of the meal, the kids will be racing around
the house like long lost buddies. And who knows? Maybe you
and the mom will hit it off.
3. Give your child a way to hold onto you during the day.
For many kids, the biggest challenge is saying goodbye to you.
Develop a parting ritual, such as a hug and a saying: “I love you, you
love me, have a great day and I’ll see you at 3!” Most kids like a
laminated picture of the family in their pencil box. Many also
like a token for their pocket, such as a paper heart with a love note,
or a pebble you found on the beach together.
4. Calm her fears. Most school anxiety is caused
by worries that adults might find silly, such as the fear that you’ll
die or disappear while she’s at school. Point out that naturally people
who love each other don’t like parting, but she’ll have fun, you’ll be
absolutely fine, the school can always contact you, and your love is
always with her even when you aren’t. End every conversation with
the reassurance “You know I ALWAYS come back” so she can repeat this
mantra to herself if she worries.
5. Stay connected. Make sure that every day after
school you have special time with your big girl to hear all about her
day, whether it’s a 3pm snack or a long snuggle after lights-out.
6. Be alert for signs about why your child is worried. Most
of the time, kids do fine after a few weeks. But occasionally,
their unhappiness indicates a more serious issue: he’s being bullied, or
can’t see the blackboard, doesn’t understand anything, and is afraid to
speak up. Ask calm questions about his day, listen deeply, and
reflect what he tells you so he’ll keep talking. Start
conversations by reading books about school together; your librarian can
be helpful. Offer your own positive school stories (“I was so
nervous the first week I couldn’t even use the bathroom at school but
then I met my best friend Maria and I loved first grade”) and the
assurance that he’ll feel right at home soon. If you sense a
bigger issue that you can’t unearth, it’s time to call the teacher.
7. Ease the transition. If your child gets teary when
you say goodbye, use your goodbye routine and reassure her that she’ll
be fine and you’ll be waiting at the end of the day. If she
continues to have a hard time separating, see if the teacher can give
her a special job every morning to ease the transition.
8. Make sure you’re a few minutes early to pick your child up.
Not seeing you immediately will exacerbate any anxieties.
9. Downplay the time younger kids spend with you at home.
If a younger sibling is at home with you, be sure your older
child knows how boring it is at home and how much the younger sib wishes
she could go to big kids’ school.
10. Create a calm household routine with early bedtimes and
peaceful mornings. If you have to wake your kids in the
morning, they aren’t getting enough sleep. Kids who aren’t well-rested
don’t have the internal resources to cope with goodbyes, much less the
rigors of the school day. Start moving bedtime earlier every night
by having him read in bed before lights out, which also improves his
reading. And get yourself to bed early too, so you can deal calmly
with the morning rush and get everyone off to a happy start.
About the Author:
Dr. Laura Markham is the founding editor of the parenting web site
www.YourParentingSolutions.com, featuring a popular advice column
and parent-tested solutions you can use every day to connect with your
kids and create a richer family life. Dr. Markham specializes in helping
families nurture the parent-child relationships that protect today's
kids. Her work appears regularly on a dozen parenting sites and in
print; you can tune in to her biweekly chats on Wednesdays at
Pregnancy.org. Dr. Markham speaks frequently in the New York area, where
she lives with her husband, eleven year old daughter, and fifteen year
old son.
Coupons for Momscape Readers:
Offers valid for a limited time.
Office Depot Coupons: $30 off $150
Target.com Coupons:
Free shipping on select baby gear
Overstock Coupons: $5 off $100
Weight Watchers Coupon: 25% off
Join Momscape today! It's easy and free.
More Top Coupons:
Click this link and the discount shown will be automatically activated.
Moms are Raving About
> Tae Bo Kicks Billy Blanks Workout for Kids
> Collectopia Wacktivity and A Friendship Scraptacular
> Micro Spy Kit X2 Toy
> Bugaboo Chameleon Stroller
> Burt's Bees Baby Bee Skin reme
> Perego Primo Viaggio Infant Car Seat
> Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, by Ina May Gaskins
> Rocket Spanish
> NordicTrack 740 Stepper
> More Product Reviews